hollowsolid: Bear Mush For Lionel

Caterpillar Missing

An eventful week around our house. In developmental terms, S lies somewhere between a caterpillar and a butterfly. Her mode of movement (or escape) from crime scene to the scene of accidents about to happen is no longer confined to shuffling her belly sniper-style along the floor trailing toxic spill and breadcrumbs in her wake, yet she remains a long way from the graceful movements of a butterfly. The Metamorphosis is proving eventful. In the past 10 days or so she has picked up a chipped tooth, a black eye (or "a blue eye" as our Polish brethern refer to it) and by the end of the week her right arm was in plaster cast. To use NFL terminology, in her rookie season our S has an abysmally low "yards per carry" average . Defensive window sills, interfering fireplaces and aggressive radiators all conspire to thwart her bipedal efforts and keep that average on the floor. And those falls are taking their toll.

Before

After

The tasteful pink plaster cast was applied in Tullamore hospital. We were kind of terrified that upon presentation at the clinic she'd be immediately taken into care due to the several very obvious facial, dental and ... limbal injuries she was carrying. We were all prepared with outlandish but considered excuses; "We decided to skip montessori and go straight to cage fighting school. How could it have gone so horribly wrong?!!" D had been coached all the way from Portarlington to respond "Wasn't me....." to any enquiry from anyone in a white uniform. But nothing - worryingly so. D helpfully picked up a gastric bug during her brief time in Tullamore General and spent the week recovering. In the multiple gaseous exchanges at all hours over the next 48 hours, her collection of Dora books were completely destroyed and she spent the week watching Series 3 of the "Puppet" Show for punishment. We're erring on the side of extreme caution now and both our daughters have recently been fitted with full-contact Junior-B grade protective equipment to facilitate S's Metamorphosis.

"Nightshade" limbers up before a bout with a domestic appliance

D Suffers For The Sins of Her Sister

Never a dull moment and never a full night's sleep. In other news, S's list of soubriquets grows a-pace. Her new one is "Lionel" (Lee-O-Nel) because she's so.......

....messy

What follows is incontrovertible pictorial evidence to disavow you (or any social workers who might pay a visit) of the notion that we are neglectful parents who allow their one year old girl get in fist fights and reassure you that we're just a normal family trying to survive the Metamorphosis. Marvel at our intensely happy children leisurin' in combat-free contentment....

Our eldest daughter having fun with fruit